Sort of like a conference, but mainly a conversation, stimulated through 4 seperate blogs. I just found out about it today, already went to the sites, read the blogs, and commented on some. Today is day 3 in a 5-day blog-off about Campus Crusade, ministry, tools, motivation, the heart of all of it, servanthood, change, and faith. I think this is a great idea, Brian Barela sums it up best for me when he wrote,

In the last few months, I have become increasingly bothered by the reality that there so many staff out there with tons of wisdom, knowledge, and experience, yet little interaction. With blogging and other online platforms, I have seen that we now have the tools to begin bridging this gap, and leveraging our organizational size in new ways.

So, here are the blogs of the blogference, you too, can participate, or at least read in on the conversation.

Shane Deike

DJ and Alisha Jenkins

Brian Virtue

Ken Cochrum

Brian Barela

I came across this, a blog I wrote on July 9th, 2006. It was right after my return to Slovakia and it’s very helpful now, as I’m thinking forward about going to live there for a year. Here it is:
well i’m back. here i am. i miss europe, desperately. all i can think about it the people, the place, the culture, the language, the spiritual deadness, the food, the way there is no air conditioning, the public transportation, the prices, the exchange rates, the life there, our apartment in prague, being a local. all of these things and more come back to me as i am sitting in my freezing home in wilmington. it’s hard for me to understand completely what God did in my heart while I was in Slovakia - but it was cool. I definite overhaul of my heart and things that I focus on. even as i think back to how i’ve lived in the past few years without regard to hundreds of other countries out there, in comfort. i know it’s time for a change. God is calling me to something different, something not as comfortable, something for the world. i loved getting to know people there, being with the students on campus was difficult and really draining as we labored for two weeks to share our faith with medical and law students. some took the time to listen, mostly we saw girls turn their heads to their books instead of to Christ. it was a hard two weeks, mostly rainy and cold. the hardest part was trusting God with the results. in these two weeks and the weeks that followed i learned a lot about how God’s word does not return void. it accomplishes the purpose for which it was sent (isaiah 55:10). overall it was a learning curve to trust God and take steps of faith. i think that might just be the definition of successful witnessing. now that i’m home i’m finding it hard to get back into life in america. people seem back stabbing, non caring, shallow. i guess i can be the one who isn’t those things, and that somehow changes other people, i don’t know - that’s a ghandiism, and we all know that it’s God who changes people. not us. if there is one thing i learned in SK, it’s that. He opens the eyes of the nonbeliever, my job is to go.

Well, you can’t just stop, so in a sense, the title is lost. I do; I just keep thinking about things I want to broadcast to the world, like a dear college road blog, or a blog about settling, and perhaps one about the value of life, or about ministry, or about trajectory, or maybe about where God is leading me. There are so many possiblities, and I’m trying to catch up. I wish technology was so, that when I was thinking these things I could hit a button on my computer chip hand and my thoughts would become a blog - at a moment of my choosing. Obviously it’s not always good to have your thoughts spread about a portion of webspace. Maybe just maybe I’ll catch up to myself. This is a picture I took downton at the help center. I don’t know why we call it that - but we do. Eventually I’ll blog again. Until then…

so this is my second attempt at writing a new post on this here blog. i did learn that blog is a mating of two words web log, and someone started calling it blog. that was free info just for you.

it’s fall break and most everyone has skipped town, including my roommates, lauren, and most of the students. i’m pretty sure i haven’t had this much free time on my hands in a really long time. it feels good, but it also feels lonely. i went to the gym and then to pcj to get an anna bananna and i sat there reading the encore and thinking about how lonely life is without people. and okay, that sounds like a not-so-smart comment. but really, my life is filled with amazing people, and i can’t quite imagine what it would be like without them. it makes me think of those students or those young professionals who haven’t found community or authenticity or a place to fit. i’m just pretty darn convinced that my life would be 80zillionmillion times harder without people who love me in it.

i’m still reading real sex, but i’m almost done and i’ll have to say i’m learning a lot through it. just about real issues and the way we think about sex, and what that looks like inside of a marriage relationship. i think it’s a book worth reading, especially to you out there who has a distorted view of sex. which, is probably everyone. the book is designed for those who are waiting for marraige, but i think just about anyone can benefit.

now that i’m on the other side of the busyness of fall, i am thanking God for all that He’s done, and the new students that he brought in. It’s really amazing. With 19 functioning small groups in every dorm on campus and students who are owning the mission, God is working and changing uncw for Christ. i’m just excited to be a part of it.

i’m just hanging around here this fall break and looking forward to tomorrow, i get to do grow zone for 2 services, how awesome. i love those kids and teaching them that Jesus is their friend forever.

here it is. we have officially been here a week. i have decided to check email and blog only once a week. things here are going great, except for one really rainy and cold day that we had yesterday. we have been on campus for 3 days now at mediska (the medical school) meeting students and asking them questions about spiritual things. most have never heard or thought about what happens after death and therefore have not really considered what life really means. me and the girls in my group; sarah, lindsey, stephanie, ashley, and elizabeth as well as two stinters Stacy and Meg have had the opportunity to meet students and share with them about what we believe and why we traveled over three thousand miles to share that with them. the spiritual climate here is much different than america. most people in america have heard the name of Jesus at one time or another - many are jaded by the church, or have had a bad experience with a Christian and the struggle is getting them to come back - to truth. however, most here have been jaded by communism and there is not a need to get better - because everyone is the same - there is no striving. a better life is almost out of the question - and then we walk into their lives - into their story of what is already going on - and we share with them these things about grace, truth, faith, and Jesus - and it’s all very brand new. it takes time. it is definitely a process. we need to pray that long termers will be raised up to live here and walk with these slovaks through life and on the path towards knowing Christ personally. all of which we take so for granted in america.
things here are great, we are living at a hostel pretty close to the main street. we have breakfast and dinner provided at the hotel and then we go to main street to find lunch. i am finding that i really love it here, more and more. i am praying for the Lord to increase my heart for the slovaks so that i will love them out of a genuine heart and have compassion on them to know Christ. this is not of myself, so that i cannot boast. that’s the power of grace.
we are studying Jonah and it’s really rich. we had our first bible study yesterday and i really learned a lot. last night we went to see the da vinci code and brought slovak students that we have met on campus these first few days with us. we did not have any come from our campus because they are in exams right now - and medical school exams are pretty tough as you might imagine. several other schools had students come and they will be getting into more conversations today about God and what was true in that movie if anything. obviously the movie is fiction and we are not basing anything on it, rather, we are hoping to open up different conversations about truth and things that many people have not even considered.
oh. you’ll love this. there is a guy here that is taking massive amounts of pictures. i am pretty sure the total is over 1000 at this point and he has taken the time to put around 300 of those on his website. so enjoy these!

We arrived in Slovakia yesterday! It is beautiful! We boarded a plane in Atlanta, GA around 4:30 on Wednesday afternoon and arrived in Sk at 4:30 on Thursday. We flew from Atlanta to Frankfurt to Vienna straight into Kosice. It was a nice trip. We all arrived safe, and only a few bags were spared. All in all there are 46 of us. Our time in Atlanta was good, a brief day and a half of preparing the 36 students for what will come there way. Over and over again I have heard the same thing - what day is it? Changing through time zones can really do harm to your schedule! Mostly for me it has been great to be here so far. We drove in and all I could think about was how beautiful it is. The fountain in downtown Kosice is alive with dancing. Today a bunch of students graduated and there was much public drunkeness on Hlavna (the only time Slovaks are loud in public is when they are drunk). Today we learned about the culture some more and how to be sensitive. We talked a lot about how we are entering their culture and we are not trying to make them conform to ours. One really cool thing that Doug Meyerdirk (the Country director) talked about today is that if something is different from America we should probably think that there is a reason for it instead of criticizing it. I thought that was a really good way to look at it.

Dr.Crawford Lorritts spoke with us at briefing about how going to the world is important work, but there is nothing magical about getting on a plane and going somewhere. He made it very clear that Jesus did not die for Slovakia, or for any country, he died for people. We just have to go to them. I loved that.

There is a fountain that dances in the middle of Hlavna (main street) it is a fountain that people are drawn to, they will go out there and sit for hours, watching it dance to the music in the background. I too, go out there, I take pictures of it, and I try to take it all in, to behold it. Last night as I was praying and journaling, I believe that God gave me this picture - that my prayer for Slovakia is that people would be drawn to Christ just as they are to the fountain. Pray that with me.

Well I only have 4 more minutes left here at the internet cafe, but I wanted to let you know that I am safe and loving it! Pray for us - our days of ministry begin tomorrow, we will begin going to the universities and meeting students in hopes of sharing the most important thing in our lives with them; Christ.

cau.

I wanted to blog because, well, I feel freedom when I blog. I am on the edge of artsy right now, thinking about all of the things I could create and change to be more me. I am tired of the way things are, like the way my room is arranged. It seems like the only solution though, unless overnight I can get some new furniture. I want to create a new place for people to go and sit and read and drink coffee and use free wireless that doesn’t close at 7pm. I want to create a fun place for singles to meet that isn’ t highlighted with pressure to get married. I want to create a place for women to be honest with each other and to talk about the real struggles they are going through as a single or a married. I have lots of hopes and dreams, and I know that if none of these things ever happen, I will still have lived a full life because of Christ.

There is a girl sitting across from me reading a Bible and studying something. Earlier three women were in here planning a Chrysalis flight. I went on Chrysalis when I was a freshman in college, it was one of those high spiritual experiences. When I got back to Meredith, it wore off after a couple of days.

Today my roommate told me that she isn’t living in our house next year. She thinks it’s too expensive and I tend to agree. I just hate the process of moving, it’s so much! Not only is it all of my books and things, it’s also my furniture (yes, the same furniture I am now wanting to rearrange). So now, I am looking for a roommate for next year, there are a few possibilites but I really just want to trust God with it. He is the one that is going to find the perfect living environment and friendship for me…not me.

I sometimes wonder about life and where we are in the process of living. I was talking with my friend Holden the other day and it seems as if our lives have just begun. I mean, really it is true. We’re just on the brink of everything. I mean, really in the next 5 years, I will most likely (Lord willing) get married, maybe change jobs, move a few times, and maybe even have a bun in the oven. Who knows, I’m just glad that I’m not in this alone. That even as a single, I can place my hope fully (1 Peter 1) in Christ, not in marriage, or lots of money, or even new furniture, but Christ alone.

This is really refreshing and freeing, it’s also so unknown. There is a lot to trust God with. Especially in the future.

I’ve been doing this new thing this week, called working out. So far, I like it, it’s just that it is…work.

Speaking of work, I’ve been off work for a week now. It’s been good, but I’ve really actually still been working and meeting with students. Just last week I saw a girl trust Christ with me right in the middle of Starbucks! Ministry is so unpredictable and exciting, I think that’s one of the reasons that I love campus ministry. I have been having fun watching God perform miracles on campus, His provision and providence are remarkable, it’s like nothing you’ve ever seen. He provided us with a sound system when we needed it, a new room to meet in, student leaders, and now He’s provided us with a vpu (crucial to ministry). I am so amazed by how in big and small ways God provides and wants us to lean completely on Him for His provision.

Today I read a chapter in Blue Like Jazz about money. It was really good, it was about tithing and whats behind doing that. Man, I recommend that book to you! It’s so refreshing because it’s not written from this “wacko fundamentalist republican” stand point, it’s very out of the box and just what I need. Last year, during the election, I was sorta brainwashed by republican propaganda, and I’m not saying that I have any regrets cause really I learned a lot. One thing, that has come about recently is my unwillingness to love other people just as they are. I really just love people that look like me, you know, the ones that are easy to love. Not the ones that are maybe a different race or in a different socio-economic class. I don’t love those people. Anyway, I really have been convicted and learning a lot about this. Don Miller, in Blue Like Jazz, writes about how his church, Imago-Dei loves people, and they are growing. What would it look like in our own lives if we just started loving people? I’m going to try it and I’ll let you know what happens. I’m pretty sure God’s got something huge to teach me.

I think that’s enough rambling for now.

You’re probably wondering the benefits of the blog. I’ve come up with a list of some.

1. where else can all 2 billion people in the world read your thoughts?
2. a good way to consolidate links
3. i’m a verbal processor, but sometimes i don’t have anyone to process with, like when it’s 3 am.
4. meeting random friends in south korea that have a heart for slovakia
5 .google created it
6. it’s not as trashy as myspace
7. i’ll never be able to track who reads this - who are you?
8. a good way for me to share what God is doing in my life without mass emails
9. let’s face it, i just needed one more way to procrastinate
10. staying connected with the many people i know through their blogs or xangas

She says baby
It’s 3 am I must be lonely
When she says baby
Well I can’t help but be scared of it all sometimes
Says the rain’s gonna wash away I believe it
-Matchbox 20

well, there’s a lot to share about my life recently. i wanted to blog sooner, but it seems as if i never had the chance to really sit down and do it. sometimes life is like that for me.

anyway, not this past week, but the week before on campus, we did spiritual interest surveys. they are great ways to get in an evangelistic conversation in 3 minutes flat. i talked with many on campus at uncw that didn’t believe that there was a God, but even now - two weeks later, there is one conversation that really stands out to me. i was with a student involved in our ministry named laura, we were walking and praying that God would lead us to someone that needed to talk. He led us straight to two girls sitting at a picnic table, it was warm out and a big clock overhead displayed the time, for these two girls time is not on their side. we approached them and asked them to help us with the survey, they said they only had about 5 minutes to talk. we promised to keep it at 5 minutes. we sat down, they introduced themselves. fuschia and mimi were there names. laura started with the first question, “do you believe there is a God, and if so, what is He like?” they jolted, “now’s not a good time for this, i’ve been thinking a lot about it.” eager to keep the conversation going i asked, “what do you mean, you’ve been thinking a lot about it.” needless to say, we didn’t need the survey at all. we entered into one of the most exciting conversations about faith that i’ve ever been in. my heart broke as fuschia described her life and how she didn’t think God could ever be a part of that. she asked me, “do you feel sorry for me because you think i’m going to hell?” all i have to say is, wow. i mean, point blank. the holy spirit in me responded with ease - saying, “i don’t know that you will go to hell, one day you might believe in God, besides, why do you care what i think, we’re accountable to a Holy God, not a sinful kelly. it was amazing. God softened her heart. I saw this fuschia totally disarmed. mimi on the other hand was a different sort of wild card, she grew up greek orthodox but believed God to be a personal force interacting with us in the world. two seemingly contradictory ideas. i dialogued with her a little about this. at the 10 minute mark, i told them that i wanted to be sensitive to their time and asked if i could get back in touch with them by email to see if they would be willing to talk any more on the subject. they continued to ask questions and i asked more questions. 30 minutes later, we were still talking, i was mainly listening and praying that God would do something in their hearts. evangelism is always win-win. i was really excited about the conversation, knowing that God was totally doing it. this opened my eyes once again for the spiritual needs on campus. i really believe that fuschia and mimi will both one day know the One True God. i gave them the website everyseahawk.com and told them that a lot of their answers could be found there, but to continue the search for Truth.

this past week was a whirlwind, too. it started really hard. staff team conflict on a new level. God was so gracious this week. i’ve really seen a renewed passion within me for God and His word, i truly praise Him for this! what an amazing thing. one night before i went to bed i was checking my email. i had one from a girl wanting to know the historical and literary context of Habakkuk, i looked it up, sent her the response and then proceeded to read the entire book.

Purpose: To show that God is still in control of the world despite the apparent triumph of evil.

Author: Habakkuk

To whom written: Judah (the southern kingdom) and God’s people everywhere

Date written: Between 612 and 588 BC

Setting: Babylon was becoming the dominant world power and Judah would soon feel Babylon’s destructive force

Key people: Habakkuk, the Chaldeans (Babylonians)

Key place: Judah

it really stood out to me considering the condition of the world right now, the apparent triumph of evil. knowing that Christ has the ultimate victory is our comfort, but what do we do in the meantime? it seems as if evil lurks around every one of life’s corners. so needless to say, staff prayer was alive as we prayed through habbakuk, learning more about how to trust God in the midst of pain and difficulty. i need You. it’s a wake up call. it may seem simple, but i’m telling you, once you begin to realize you really can’t live this life without the Holy Spirit doing it through you, it’s a constant fight. i gave in, and it’s the best decision i’ve ever made.

i’ve been studying 1 Peter. i am learning so much! i don’t even know how to convey it all. God has really been teaching me about how awesome He is. and i don’t mean awesome like a cheerleader might use it for a football team, i mean awesome like, i stand in AWE and i don’t know how to use any other word to describe what He is doing in my heart. indescribable.

one night, the most random thing happened. i met a girl, teaching esl in south korea who loves the Lord and has a heart for Slovak people. wow, so random. mostly because i found her blog by clicking next blog at the top of the page. i left her a comment and told her i am encouraged by her blog and what the Lord is teaching her. then, i added her IM name to my buddy list and literally two seconds later she signed on. we chatted and rejoiced in mutual random encouragement. how awesome is the body of Christ!

friday night was Crusade’s halloween party, we did it to invite and get to know nonCru people. i think it worked. there were about 50 or so people there. it was a good time, with tyler’s sound system.

another really cool thing happened, God really worked in my relationship with Matt, He told me so much of what i needed to know. it feels really good to be in His will. i will seek Him.

more pictures here.

I’m in process, just like you. I don’t claim to have it all figured out, or even a lot of it figured out for that matter. All I know is that God is teaching me in dynamic ways since I’ve moved here to Wilmington. I guess, it all started with this summer, grounded in the Word and Who the Holy Spirit is, then here - marveling at God, His works, the wonder of His creation - land, sea, and sky (all which can be seen from the town I live) and the Cross, why did Jesus die? Big questions and big hopes of these things have been echoing in the chambers of my heart as I search far and wide to learn more of who God is. I heard it said that the least we can do is to wonder at how big God is. That makes me think…usually people approach that in doubt, but if you approach it in wonder, how big is God? Why does He do what He does? Like send Katrina, and Rita, Philip, and Tammy. Why? It’s for His purpose, He will accomplish what He wills.

I’m amazed by God, it’s a good place to be, amazement. It’s really wide though, and I’ve found myself in thinking mode - asking “Why” a lot, like a curious 2 year old. But, I wonder at Him, who He is.

I’m reading Blue Like Jazz, which happens to be fabulous. Don Miller is a great writer, I recently finished Searching for God Knows What. Both very good and out of the box. As I am reading through it I think of a list of friends that I want to read it, is that normal? You may very well be one of them.

There’s a list of books I want to finish before year’s end. So I better get to reading. Good thing I’m on fall break where I can do just that.

Today, I decided with one of my Wilmington friends, Katie, to read and study 1 Peter together. I am so excited about it. It’s so great to have friends here. Katie is on staff with Campus Outreach in Minneapolis, which is very similar to Campus Crusade, in that it was born from Campus Crusade to reach smaller campuses in which CCC was not staffing. CO works out of local churches, so in Minneapolis she will be working out of John Piper’s church, Bethlehem, and is currently raising her support in Wilmington. It’s so good to get to be here with her- and understand what she is going through. Support is so hard.

I love my small group here. It’s so fun. I’ll try to get a picture of them soon so I can post it.

Trust God in all things. Check out this verse. “ Trust in the LORD forever, for the LORD, the LORD, is the Rock eternal. ”- Isaiah 26:4