So what’s the use in having a blog, if you don’t use it. I’m not sure - it’s just taking up valuable web space. So, I figured, I needed to tap into webspace again and verbalize a few things.

In a lot of ways I feel wrecked, not by emotions purely, and not by circumstances, and I don’t mean any of this to alarm anyone, I just feel like life a lot of times makes you feel caught off guard.

I feel like a lot of days, I’m not up-to-speed in the normal “American” pace of life. It’s a weird thing. I don’t feel like I function at the same level of productivity as I used to. Although, I do have to take into consideration the reality that I am starting in a lot of new things. But, it still amazes me that my memory fails me often (and I don’t think this has anything to do with being closer to 30- so slow down on the jokes).

I’ve been learning deeply from the Lord - He’s been teaching me about what a blessing it is that He saved me, even from myself, not just from the enemy. This basic truth motivates my life in so many ways. There is a verse packaged in Jeremiah 29, and no, it’s not even verse 11, that says this,

Build houses and settle down; plant gardens and eat what they produce. 6 Marry and have sons and daughters; find wives for your sons and give your daughters in marriage, so that they too may have sons and daughters. Increase in number there; do not decrease. 7 Also, seek the peace and prosperity of the city to which I have carried you into exile. Pray to the LORD for it, because if it prospers, you too will prosper. (Jer 29:4-7)

The truth that exists inside of that passage of scripture permeates me as I think of praying to the Lord for the sake of the city I’m living in, it makes me realize the depths of church ministry and the reality of the power of the cross to intersect in lives and to bring unity, clarity, and wholeness to broken lives.

I think as I’ve entered into church world, I’ve realized the supreme neediness of those around me, those who are in need of someone to walk beside them, and to pray for them, to challenge, and to keep accountable. I’ve been so used to working with college students, who, for the most part, have not been hit by life yet. But life, it gets really really hard, and people have really difficult things to deal with.

The truth of Him saving us, must echo in our hearts, it must resound in the way we live, and all too often I just think it doesn’t do that. I think in the usual, day-to-day we are more caught up in the tasks of life to stop and realize the depths of salvation.

This verse, has stuck with me, ever since I read it last week, it says this:

If the LORD had not been on our side— (Ps 124:1)

What can you say, if the Lord had not been on your side…

…think of how much worse off we would be.

….if you are struggling now, if your marriage is in shambles, if you are in a conflict, if you are depressed, think of what it would look like without the Lord on our side.

We have so much to be thankful for and we don’t even realize it.

I feel like God did this. There really isn’t any other way to describe what has gone on since my return to America. So many things, have just really come together. Things that I never thought would. I’ll give you the brief run down of things that I see God providing me with. A roommate, an apartment (in a place I thought I’d never be able to really live), friends, a car, a job, verbal affirmation, friends to help me move in both Raleigh and in Wilmington, an iphone, and community. God is so very, very gracious. I feel overwhelmed that He chooses to provide for me in such real and tangible ways.

I’m so overwhelmed with all kinds of thankfulness and truth. I’m glad to be in this season, where I am, enjoying life, and in many ways so glad for all that God has done in my life so far.

The past month has brought on some hard realities about returning to America - missed out inside jokes, shared experiences, and just a general feel that I was really really gone, and life here went on. It’s harder now than it was when I first returned and I think that’s because the honeymoon phase has faded and I’m now entering into some crazy realities of what you experience as a returned missionary.

But there’s a lot going on in my life, and no one around me denies it. Most understand it and give me grace to live.

I’m getting settled into my new apartment and I’m loving it. I can’t wait to have friends over and make this a home!

This is not coincidence, none of it. I recognize all of this as full provision from Jesus. I’m so thankful and the full reality that I don’t deserve any of this is sweeping over me like a rushing river.

I got back last night from a full week in Serbia. It was a really great time filled with God’s complete provision for our needs. I’m sitting here at my desk in Kosice now and am just so thankful for all that He did. I just really wish you could have been there to see it. I want to write a longer update, but I’m in the midst of packing everything to return to America on Friday. So, I’ll try to write more when I get the chance.

Here’s a picture of our group last night, after we arrived back from our 8 day journey.

John Mayer, sings these lyrics in his song titled, “Something’s Missing”
“Something’s missing, and I don’t know how to fix it, Something’s missing, and I don’t know what it is, no I don’t know what it is, at all” You can see a pictorial representation, in this video (below).

These lyrics, and this song, have been the theme of my Spring semester here in Slovakia. I’ve seen girls say this, time and time again. One girl, in particular, Miška, who became a believer almost a year ago, is growing in her faith. Several times she told me she had the opportunity to share with classmates that something was missing in her life, and now she knows what it was; Jesus.
Another girl that I have the privilege of working with, Zuzka, shared with me recently that she feels like she now has purpose in life and that she knows God wants to use her to tell others about the hope of eternity. (Me with Miska and Zuzka pictured below)

We’ve continued to use a tool called Soularium on campus, where we engage with students in conversation over a set of 50 pictures and a survey with questions like these, “which 3 images would you use to describe your life” and “which picture would you use to describe your spiritual journey so far.” Students will say things like “I know there is a light, but I don’t know how to get to it,” (Kristina) “I think God is standing on the other side of the door but I don’t know how to open it.” (Julia) When students say things like these, I feel completely privileged to engage in conversations with them about spiritual things and the joy of knowing Christ.
In addition to working with students like Miška and Zuzka and doing Soularium on campus, I also had the chance to be trained in a new strategy, called Story of the Soul at the Eastern European Headquarters in Budapest. Story of the Soul “is a conversational journey in a coffee house-like setting. The Gospel is shared after considering stories the soul of man has been telling for eons through: film, music, classic literature, pop culture, poetry, artwork, and history.” Check it out on you tube (below).

and a few pictures from my time in Story of the Soul training…

I also have the privilege of organizing a summer project to Serbia! Where we will be working in a Slovak village with high school and college students. There are still many details that need to be worked out and students that need to sign up! Please pray for Kristina, Baska, Jozo, Sebastian, and Ivan to come with us to Serbia! We really believe that Serbia will be a major catalyst for our students to see God use them! Pray with us for BIG things. You are a blessing to me!

Please look around on my blog, in addition to this update there are also posts about my life overseas, a new video series I’m starting called, “what I’m going to miss about Slovakia, ” my top 5 travel items, as well as an update on a recent women’s weekend (please withhold judgement and keep in mind this is not the south!) Please leave a comment! I love to know who reads my blog and what you think.

Thanks for your support and for praying for the gospel to advance on the hard soil of Eastern Europe!

i keep reading and rereading these verses i think this is because it speaks to the core of how i need to be thinking and living. Paul, the writer of Philippians, has just finished giving all of his credentials, he even says “I could have confidence in myself if anyone could,” proving that this guy has some substance to his words by listing his family’s history (pure-blooded Jewish fam, from the tribe of Benjamin) then he lists his personal achievements (member of the Pharisees and even persecuted the Christian church!, and followed the Jewish law without fault), it’s not just idle talk. Then, he says this:

I once thought these things were valuable, but now I consider them worthless because of what Christ has done. Yes, everything else is worthless when compared with the infinite value of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord. For his sake I have discarded everything else, counting it all as garbage, so that I could gain Christ and become one with him. I no longer count on my own righteousness through obeying the law; rather, I become righteous through faith in Christ. For God’s way of making us right with himself depends on faith.

Philippians 3:7-9

i don’t know about you, but that kicks my tail. i think I shall memorize these verses.

That’s what a girl said to me today after I shared the gospel with her. It just sounds so wrong and it is. Like taking Jesus out for a test drive, or some equivalent. Keep praying for her. Her name is Sandra. I gave her the little booklet - in English and in Slovak and told her to think it over and I’d call her in a week. I’ll keep you updated. Thanks for praying for her.